A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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Finding TWO worms in your apple.

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

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Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

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Roses are red Violets are blue I shit my pants do you want my poo.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

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Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Gay marriage is freaking gay.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops