How many light bulbs? 1

I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

Whats big, grey, and cant climb trees? A carpark

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because having no sense of hearing or vision she is completely incapable of operating any sort of machinery.

Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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