What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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Women's rights

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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