What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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