Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

What's green, brown, red, and is covered with crumbs in a ditch on the side of the road? A girl-scout who got hit by a car...

Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

So you have been really stressed lately huh?

Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

PENIS lol

Whats worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding an apple in your worm

A baby seal walks into a club.

I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

Why couldn't the little kid get to sleep? His dog was on fire

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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