A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

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okay so theres this guy.

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You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

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Did you hear the joke about the butter? No.

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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There once was a man called steve, His name was steve

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Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

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What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

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What happens when you drive down the road? you get to the end of the road

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

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lewis=cardiac

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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