Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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Did the Jewish surgeon charge extra for circumcisions? Nope, he just kept the tips

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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what do call a dead dog in between two planks of wood? big sandwhich.

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What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

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How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

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Why did the black woman have an affair? Because she had an unsatisfying sex life, her old husband was boring, and she was curious about being with other men.

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

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Why was Barack Obama wearing a Justin Bieber T-Shirt and slapping you with a pitchfork? Because you didn't listen to me when I told you to stop doing shrooms

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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What do you call a fat priest? Obese

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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Why did the little boy sit next to the big boy? Because he wanted to get raped by big Jake!

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

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When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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Dyslexia ruels!

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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