Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How did the old guy die? Of death and death related symptoms.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When do doctors make house calls? When you're sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops