I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

Can midgets still have big dreams?

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

How do you piss off a jew slash his tires

don't just stand there

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

vitamin c

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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