Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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Q: What's the best part of having sex with twenty-seven year olds? A: By age twenty-seven the average person has reached sexual maturity, and has also developed mentaly enough to understand, and subsequently process the intimate nature of an adult relationship.

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Yo momma is so stupid when she drove to Disney World she saw that said "Disney World Left" so she turned on her turn signal and made a left turn. She promptly arrived at Disney World but realized she had left her wallet at the hotel.

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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