Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? About 144 licks but everyone gets different answers because we all lick lollipops differently.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -8

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Are you black? Kill yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man say to his dead wife? "I'm Blind."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's a good way to kill time? It's impossible to kill an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops