"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the small child cry? He was forced to dig his own grave at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your momma is so old, it is likely that she will pass away in the near future, and I would recommend you to spend some quality time with her.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down -4

so a piece of grass is walking down the street..... wait a minute thats not right.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the fish get flushed down the drain? because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What KFC? Deep fried aborted babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's similar about a black person and a white person? They're both black, apart from the white person

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What’s the best part about knowing things no one else does? Nothing. I’m schizophrenic and can’t afford medication.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops