Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

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I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

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It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school today? Because it is Saturday

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus? He got hit by a bus and died.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? When they were tossing frisbee and accidentally tossed it into their neighbors yard and they had to go get it.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Girl: I wanna get yo pants. Boy: but im wearing shorts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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