If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -1

your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yo mom as so dumb.... That she has a low IQ

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -1

My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

i'm hard

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops