The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

thumb_up thumb_down -8

On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the murderer do to the dentist? Nothing, the murderer has served his time and is clean. But he did get his teeth cleaned.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops