Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than failing a test Drowning

thumb_up thumb_down -23

do you know what was a good idea? not last night

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than beating a dead horse? Nothing. Beating a horse is just too much fun

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's red, blue & green all over?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops