there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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How do you make a blonde woman act in a porno? You get her consent and pay her money.

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you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

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25.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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Why did Lucy drop her ice-cream ? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who is there ? NOT LUCY !

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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Antijokes...

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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So Nero, what the fuck are you doing? XD

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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