Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here I don't get it

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Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

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Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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The duck didn't cross the road.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Murder his family.

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Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

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Why did Johnny throw his money on the floor? Because he was giving it to charity

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

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A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

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what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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