If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

Whats worse then a rainy day? Rape.

RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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