"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

You see that dog over there with no tail? You know what that means, don't you? What? Someone cut it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why couldn't Jimmy run in the track race? Because he has been paralyzed since he was 3, due to a horrible accident

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a dead Jewish girl that lay on the other side. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Henry's mom packed Henry sweaters And lots of things besides sweaters Henry went to war He saw lots of gore Logically, he wouldn't need a sweater because he had to wear his uniform during the battle. Did i mention that Henry likes chocolate?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats cold and can't climb trees? Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what didn't I do when making this joke? Read and agree to the terms of service.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Getting all F's on your report card isnt that bad.... I mean you could go home to find your whole family murdered and your Girlfriend hanging from a noose.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops