How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

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-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

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here's a joke... the american education society

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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dont you love porch monkeys? no.

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What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

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Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

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what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

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ring around the rosie ... your dead

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Rebecca Black sings a song.

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What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

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Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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