Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

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What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

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Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A man walks in front of a bus. The bus driver avoids the man but hits the boy eating ice cream.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

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What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

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why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

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What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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What do you call a baby that got hit by a train? Thomas

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? Because she had no arms. Knock, Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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Why wasent Toby at school He was hit by a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops