What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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69

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Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

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Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

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How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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