A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

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Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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What happened to the young baby after her mother died It grew up got a collage degree and had a great life growing up with her dad and visiting the cemetery every year

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How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

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A Jew walks into a wall with a boner. He breaks his nose.

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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Your gay

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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