What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

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WHAT DO YOU CALL SOMEONE HAVING A MYOCARDIAL INFARCTION? Dead

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one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Ring ring yes.This is doctor steve and we got our test results and it seems that you'r son has butinites and you'r kind sytoms are nothing because he is just an ass.

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ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

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Wanna hear a joke? Woman's rights.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

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Why was Mary's phone call suddenly disconnected? She was raped.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

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Katy Perry

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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What is brown and sticky? A Stick

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

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Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops