Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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A dyslexic blind man

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hi mom

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want more?

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

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Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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a boy jumps through a mirror and out a window then he fell so now he's dead.

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What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf guy ? He didn't.

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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Racial Equality

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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A man died.

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A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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