How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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Immigration Laws

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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No Nero, you see, a great man once told me that happiness is not something you look for and eventually find, but something that you decide that you already are.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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