How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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knock knock "who's there?" "boo" "boo who?" dont worry its only a joke dont cry.

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How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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Tom: Did you here about the blond who went to college? Mike: No. Tom: Well I heard she's leading a very successful life.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops