What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

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neil likes pube toast

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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What's worse than finding a worm in ur Apple? Finding a worm in ur poop

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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what did mohammed say to Jesus? nothing they lived in completly different time periods

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whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

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Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow And daisies can be a wide variety of colours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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