Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

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why did dominic buy a new speaker on holiday because his parents died and his was at home

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what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw them

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

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Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

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How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

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Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

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There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

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What's worse than getting raped then killed? Getting killed then raped.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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What did the little boy get from his visit to Penn State? Raped.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

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a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

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thomas!!!!

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Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

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Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

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Knock knock! who's there? Doctor Doctor who? No, this is your actual doctor, you have cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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