What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

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What do you call a flying Jew? Smoke

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

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Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

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The first train go fowards at 250 mph, and the second train takes a left, how many pancakes are on my rooftop? - The answer is purple because aliens don't dribk coffee

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Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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