a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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Whats not funny and no one wants to waste the time to reading it? This joke

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How do you make a 6-year-old cry again? Tell him that without further change to the system, he'll end up paying $100,000 for school and then not have a job when he graduates.

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Why did a black man put his hands on a white man? They were hugging.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

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If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning.

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What's worse than beating a dead horse? Nothing. Beating a horse is just too much fun

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

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what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

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what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

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Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

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What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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