My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

A seal walks into a club.

Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

Reading the Terms and Conditions

Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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