How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Link ate ink to make him sink.

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

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What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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kennah campion when she talks

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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Why did Todd have intimacy problems? He was molested as a child.

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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

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What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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