Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

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Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

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Why was the Black Boy shot? It was because he was walking alone at night in a dangerous neighborhood, where there are many gangs. People should know not to go alone at night in dangerous places, or even in the day.

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

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Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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poop.

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

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What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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the economy.

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

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A man goes to a petting zoo. He sees a zookeeper wrestling a bear. The bear kills the zookeeper and escapes from it's cage. It promptly mauls the rest of the staff and visitors at the zoo until it is shot by local police.

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What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

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When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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