What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

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What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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joke

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A skinny white prisoner dropped his soap in the shower. So the big, ripped, black prisoner who was showering next to him picked up the soap and handed it back to him. The skinny white prisoner said "Thank you" and continued with his shower.

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Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

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If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

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glens walk to the kitchen : The Green Mile

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there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

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Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

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what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

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what do you call a Mexican driving a plane? a pilot you were probably to racist to work that out

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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