Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

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what do you call a black chef glendon

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yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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What happens when an Asian with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose

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two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

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Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

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Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

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Why could the little girl not swim? She had rabies.

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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