how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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Roses are red, Violets are too. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing infliction.

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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Why was the snowman afraid of the sun? Because he would melt that day and die

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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As I was riding my bike down the road, I saw a young boy being raped in a dark alley way. I proceeded to pedal and acted like i had seen nothing.

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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men's rights activists

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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