Chuck noris is so awesome that he brings a knife to a gun-fight, and wins

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set? neither did she.

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Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

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I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

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Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

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Where does a king keep his armies? In his sleevies

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

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John lazzaro likes dick

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How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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What do you call a dead child? The product of a car crash

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Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

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Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops