What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

How do you mess with Hellen Keller? Re-arrange her furniture.

2 boy once went to a party. One boy dared the other to suck all the helium out of a balloon. Today this boy is know as Justin Bieber

The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

who's getting there balls chopped off by lilly? Nemo

Knock Knock Who's There 42

2 men were friends 1 went to hell The other went to heaven

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

I hear Lebron has a new phone. He has it on silent all the time. It's because he doesn't want to disturb anyone around him while they prepare for important games in which he will be an indispensable part of, especially during the 4th quarters of the NBA Finals.

Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

Ol-ive

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? Perhaps he was doing a project on tree-life.

Theodore was a small kid that lived down the street. Little did he know, that Kaiwen the Poor Pedo was his next door neighbour. So he was walking one day down the street. He saw Kaiwen dead. Because he ate too much sugar. So Theodore called the police. But his phone broke suddenly. Theodore realized that his brother had filled it with broken eggshells. He was sad. He took out a few golf balls and stuffed them in his mouth. But he couldnt forget taht a fellow neighbour had died. He buried the body beneath the Carpet of Ol' Justin's House. He wasnt happy. His dad confiscated his laptop. And the golf balls

hola said the chinese man

What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

Jamie Oliver eats a chip

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

What happened to the guy that got a perfect score on his S.A.T.'s? He was murdered.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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