What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

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Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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- Knock knock - Who's th.....AIDS

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

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What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

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That was me, I thought we where friends now... I am so sorry, I really did not send anyone nor anything, I would never do such a thing! What happened to you is terrible, I did say I knew who they where and that they are in prison, but that was a lie, I just wanted for you to think I was really confident and in control. Please Nero, let me speak to you, nothing is like you think, Jenny is my stepmother, please don't do anything.

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

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I love you

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

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Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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