Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

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Whats werst than taking candy from a baby. Throwing a baby off a cliff then eating the candy in fronts of its parents

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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Whats white and sticky? Marshmellows

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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watch me nae nae

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

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Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

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Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

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I can't believe they been together for 16 years!! Who? Deez Nutz!

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what did the little boy get for christmas? A BIKE!

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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