- Anti Joke

Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

i like how everyone hates a german version of an antijoke but no one has aknowleged the english one

A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

Why did the the black man die? Because he had an incurable disease.

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

question: do zombies eat brains answer: actually zombies don't exist, so they don't eat anything

''In Austin, Texas, President Obama told an audience, 'If you want to go forward you put your car in 'D.' If you want to go backward, you put your car in 'R.'' But you know something? Either way, the economy is still F'd.''

A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

Knock knock! Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave Smith. Oh, hey Dave. Come in.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

Q: What did the racoon say to the cow? A: Nothing, because neither have the extansive intillect to speak in a manner that the other would understand.

Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Why do black people eat watermelon? Because it taste good.

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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