A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

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What happened when they asked Steve if he was feeling blue? He confessed and went to prison for a long time for molesting that poor dog.

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why didnt the whiteperson sit down at obama's election? because he had hemorrhoids

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

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How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

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What do you call a frog with a bow tie? Cute!

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Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

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A black man walks into a bar He looks at the menu and realizes he's in a bar, so he leaves

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because crossing through traffic is very dangerous

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Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

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Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

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Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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have safe sex

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What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

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What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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