How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

A man walks into a bar, purchases a beer, and leaves.

A black man, a white man, and an Asian man walk into a bar. The black man says, "My wife died in a terrible book-keeping accident.". The white man says, "My wife died in a terrible lightbulb-sorting accident.". The Asian says, "My wife died in a terrible geography accident.". Soon after, the bar was hit by a missile, promptly killing the three men.

Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

what do you do when you forget to do your math homework? kill your teacher

Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

What did the fish say to the octopus? nothing... fish cant talk.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

womans having rights.

Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

Why does the gaming console Wii suck? ????????????????I like ice cream????????????????

What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

Why do mexicans eat tacos? Because they're good

Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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