What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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