What do you call an blank test? an F

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

Blacks

What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

glasses, jacket, shirt They call me glasses, jacket, shirt man. I never leave the house...without my brodies. hehehe hahaha hohoho!

What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

Q. Why did the television set turn on? A. Because someone pressed the power button.

how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem used for seasoning food, and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

what do you get if you put in a pan- a raw chicken, a lemon, assorted vegetables, onions, maybe some soy sauce, and a little olive oil then place this pan into an oven for around two hours, allowing the chicken to moisten. then serve with the assorted vegetable .supper.

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

Around 10PM on a Saturday two Irishmen walk into a bar. They order up a round of drinks, and comment on the appearance of several women in the place whom they believe to be single. After finishing up their drinks, the one Irishman asks the other if he'd like another one. The other says no, that he promised his wife he'd be back soon with diapers for the baby. He thanks his friend for the drink and leaves for home. The remaining Irishman orders up another "round" from the bartender, but really it's only one drink he is ordering, being he is only one person.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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