Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

What's the difference between Nelly and Common? One of them is an artist and one of them is a businessman.

Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

What's endangered like the Spotted Owl? A Cancer patient.

What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

What do you call a Jew A Jew

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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