What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

A deranged serial killer walks into a bar. No one leaves because he looks like a normal guy.

ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

WE BE-ETH YON KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE

So there's this white guy with a huge dick.

Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a hispanic guy are standing before a cliff. They proceeded to take lovely pictures.

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

Nero, sure you are okay?

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

Q:what did the Aardvark say to the other Aardvark. A: nothing because Aardvark do not have the mental capacity to carry out basic conversations

Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

What do an elephant, and a banana have in common? Neither one is an ambulance.

A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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