Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

What did the dog say when the tiger bit him? Nothing. Dogs don't talk.

learn. advance!

What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

So Nero, seriously, don't be mean, call me, I am going to bed now, nighty nite.

A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

How do you make a person cry? Burn his family.

roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

I walked in ony my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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